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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！” }; j" I+ z! M6 a& R2 j
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”6 v+ ?6 w% J" w7 }/ x6 O
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”# n" n/ {6 }) w- J
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。 d& w+ ?+ F# A& M
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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; d! V# Y( I# b. c' ^: {7 O女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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4 L- ~# A B. o笑死我了。。。8 f2 ]- O2 Y. m" ]' w4 T+ i
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，" D. P8 E# l7 ^6 b
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，- g) X+ g( h0 M8 j
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!) T+ ^' w( a* ]4 U2 K, Z
6 x! ?/ N$ ~% ]3 Z4 T她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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0 W8 z) v$ e# A$ c晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”# j3 S6 H! x9 F/ d
1 D$ s* Q; Z3 q6 [0 j恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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# W+ k) B/ m4 O) Y: i% P. O孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…. X6 M; P- g& n
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，; J: p1 a6 j0 S. u1 V# {3 f9 S0 W
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！. Y8 T/ k6 F2 h4 ]% r$ `
4 F$ W3 f6 ^* W( J) @( Q一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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! W/ t' G( G$ l* J4 m8 z5 D' c当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？% d. z" |% O* @
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我，无业闲人一个。
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$ v z0 S* d' r( S+ K2 Q+ ~女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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6 q: B9 i: p- H5 G$ V6 T+ p女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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