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当前离线
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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”$ {6 B2 D! i- _: g+ e% g
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”0 l: N& s" w7 u8 F& o4 ^) h A
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”9 }, U3 H# m( Q/ G: @- d2 \& q8 w
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
7 ~: S R$ ^" j, D- u' Y9 ~0 e7 Y( b d
老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。7 O$ K7 @' H9 k: w: C$ \
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。4 M# P* I; T% G, m) y5 J5 w3 }
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笑死我了。。。7 e6 d" c) B& ^" X4 O D4 d' ?
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!- b( P$ x5 P/ N, J2 @# `$ P/ I
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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8 [$ O* n% c& s9 W7 x晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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# {* } n" U$ T/ ^0 R! k5 |恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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0 ~% r4 r& ~$ S4 p$ S# r6 z就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”% e. x5 A& s1 ?) i, `
3 s$ P0 A$ ?+ a" U' ^孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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/ K/ h5 x( p2 t5 W/ F0 s/ b9 ~3 _' e5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，& \! q6 ^6 I$ A! w, p' G$ c8 G
6 B& ~: N* Y2 D E我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！: R9 X! R4 b8 H) B! g; N, C: M$ N
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？8 O) K* r# ~9 v5 ~% u
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我，无业闲人一个。4 K f8 S5 Y' u" {+ a
L& c8 B7 o7 j' _1 r- a" E( ?女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？$ z% A, b9 }6 c8 z0 v" j
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。4 W: Y" d) l# W& M) ~
* ~0 p! X8 @3 t! `8 z( `女：滚她妈犊子，滚…9 t/ T" S- J/ e$ Q
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当前离线
经验:
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