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当前离线
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本月在线: 0 分钟
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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道:“先生,您能施舍我50块钱吗?我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC,怀疑地问道:“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌?” 那人急忙辩道:“不会的!赌的钱我已经要到了!”+ f- k6 A, m- I1 t9 |
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2.有一个赌棍,每次DB都会带自己的女友去,而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了,问男友:“你怎么每次赌都带我去,是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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0 |$ C" x2 B, |' a男友不屑地回答道:“你想哪儿去了,我带你去是吓他们的!”
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3.老公爱打MJ,有天上小学的女儿对他说:老湿说打麻将是Dubo,会被JC抓走的。
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g# ?* t* m+ e( j8 ?老公:怕啥呀,万一我被判刑了,你可以给老爸送饭啊。" r- ]; x4 `) K
6 k* W* ~/ k1 s; I% F女儿同情地说:万一判死刑呢。。。4 d" v9 W! F* {( F- F
, d6 H. @( }$ K& e4 I笑死我了。。。
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4.我的一个小外甥女,有一次接她放学回家,
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" V6 C; Z. r6 W* {% b& `; n9 E可能是饿了,一回家就要吃饭,/ `$ @2 M! j L0 \7 g
& B' m* O, i" W c2 d# z我就想逗逗她:小妞妞,想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦,不然没饭吃哦!. f+ V6 Q" E* X# `
4 I2 }7 N1 O+ D) t8 M3 ^她一听急了张口就来:人之初,性本善,要读书,先吃饭!
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晚上,孩子趴在桌子上写日记:“夜深了,妈妈仍在打MJ,爸爸仍在上网……”
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1 s" f( Q: _/ S$ ~- x# p恰巧爸爸走了过来,看到孩子写的这句话,有点不高兴,9 G V2 K% ^) ^. j" q4 V
0 X( [. _9 J$ @5 a- {0 G4 V9 o# e就教育孩子说:“日记不能照搬生活,要源于生活,高于生活!”
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孩子听了,马上修改为:“夜深了,妈妈仍在DB,爸爸仍在网恋…5 c5 R/ J& \# c# \5 A
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5.两天输掉十多万了,我一天的固定收入才四千,
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( U4 `; H( r( }- o# u: j我不能再沉迷于DB了,该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了!
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0 N) i$ e0 M6 k一女看我留言后:你若能改,我愿意做你女朋友。
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( `/ k- A& b' z4 v" S' u当晚我俩见面开房,睡后,躺床上女问我:你是做什么生意的?
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0 s6 P' V, K) Y, q" a- B我,无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡,那怎么每天收入四千?
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. v: K8 ~2 U# U. c我说的是欢乐豆,一天就能领四千豆。
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% F* n8 a& o, k' ?" J! {: m女:滚她妈犊子,滚…
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当前离线
经验:
天策币:
活跃币:
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总在线: 3250 小时
本月在线: 0 分钟
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