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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
7 v9 j2 K$ L/ I1 h- z6 F' ]$ {+ n0 {% k8 j6 i3 h5 B# ~: h4 f! ^
2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”3 Q9 e4 |% `; u) z1 n
7 x+ [# Q/ @0 Y! `% N2 j. Z- O) ?男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”+ y$ h) |9 ?# ]/ T5 T. V( h
% C& l4 x( O# n, i/ J0 h: j3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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' q( E% f! z' W* s老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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% K5 G1 N4 }9 Q( I女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。5 g4 K5 P& M0 H& p# |
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笑死我了。。。$ [6 h! L/ Y- e. V9 ]# Z
: W L+ t& _) _% k) D4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，5 U5 y7 d$ [/ s8 Z4 B
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!( }5 P# y7 i7 U, p+ b) Z+ ^5 ?0 }) G
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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4 j4 e+ C1 ~: Y' s恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，; d: ]& j6 b0 r6 E0 m0 F1 m F. L
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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^; r1 p9 P. C5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，! k# x5 }7 `& L8 ?
& w& A2 f2 U3 d1 R/ y. h) |我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！; l2 y* e6 [# i) n9 N
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？$ O" b* m v' D; G) }% [: |
7 d- g4 l3 U0 c; n9 q我，无业闲人一个。; A/ c6 m% M G2 q
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？" c# J9 q! e" C4 j7 ?
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我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。9 _6 H" j! `, |2 Q% n4 _
6 r; A, u, X; t' h% c女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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